Netflix and Purr, anyone?
I kid, I kid. First things first: never, under any circumstances, go to someones house for a first date. I don’t care if they said they’ll cook you dinner, that they have the raddest video games, or they they have free candy… when you first meet someone, you meet in a public place with great lighting and you get there in your own damn car. [safety rant over]
Okay on to the lighter things!! Since this is the busiest time of year for online dating, many of you are putting yourself back out there and ready to meet someone special. But the question is, what are you supposed to do on the first date? Whether it’s been decades, years, or even months since your last first date, I can help you determine the best thing to do on your first date.
What is your match into?
If you ordered an Aste report, we’ve given you about five topics that they’re really into… but more importantly we validated that they are who they said they are. You did you due diligence or had us do it, right? Because things are really scary out there. Like… really scary. Tell me you did? Okay good.
Peoples social media profiles tend to have a lot of common themes. Be it sports, travel, yoga, memes, etc. Sports? Hit up the local sports bar during a game or head to an arcade for a throwback friendly competition basketball game. Travel? Find an ethnic food restaurant near you to try together and order the house specials. Yoga? Suggest brunch after yoga 😉 Memes? Easy peasy… that’s a comedy show or open mic night. Play into their interests and into your own as compromise is key in relationships so let’s start this on the right note.
Are you in the city or the burbs?
If you’re in a major city, there’s usually city guides (The Boston Calendar is my go-to) to let you know what’s happening around you on specific dates. But now Facebook local is helping people all around the world see what’s happening around them. There’s always *something* going on, whether it be a play at your local town-hall, a movie you’ve been dying to see, a paint night, book reading… use the resources out there to help you arrive at a destination.
I know that the burbs are a little harder, but it seems you can always find a nearby bowling alley or billiard place and pretend to know what you’re doing. 😉
What’s the weather?
It’s cold these days in Boston so it’s easy to suggest a restaurant with a fireplace in the corner (Boston: South End Buttery, Oak Room, Post 390). Or you could take a hot cocoa tour, a cooking class, or head to one of the amazing museums in your city. Like the cold? Go ice skating on the Frog Pond or at Winterfest in Boston or whatever your cities version is!
If you’re sweating in Miami, Hawaii, Los Angeles, etc. you can check out an outdoor film at night or peruse one of the many open air markets. Try some salsa dancing, bring a picnic to the beach, or just take a long walk together (in public areas) and get to know each other while having an adventure in the city. Just remember, you’re warm. We’re freezing up here. Take advantage of it.
As a woman dating for what feels like forever, here are some awesome dates I’ve been on:
- Red Sox Games
- Bruins Games (note that I’m not super into sports but the fun of the crowd, the new date, the excitement is so fun!)
- Large arena concerts
- Small intimate shows
- Flying (Hi Adam!)
- Long city walks through Boston Proper
- The Halal Guys
- Sh*t Faced Shakespeare
- Ice Skating
- Open air markets
- The opera
- The symphony
- Museums (MFA, ISGA, ICA in Boston)
And then some really amazing restaurants sharing dinners and getting to know the other human sitting across from me.
What matters most about your first date is that you’ve already vetted and verified your new date and that you’re meeting them in a safe public place.
From there: BE YOURSELF! Everyone else is already taken 😉 No, but really, confidence is key on first dates. Remember that this is no pressure, you’re meeting up with someone to enjoy your time together and see if there’s a in person match. And if not? You put yourself back out there and I’m personally proud of you for that. This stuff’s tough AND tiring. But, you’ll learn a lot about yourself AND about fellow humans that roam the earth and eventually find the one that makes your heart zing. So keep at it, just keep safe.
Dating sites don’t vet or verify their members so it’s up to you to research and do your due diligence. If you don’t know how to or don’t have the time to, that’s exactly where we come in. All we need is a first name and phone number:
Light and love always,